What Tried to Steal My Worship (pt. 1)

A few years ago, I was at a worship event with pastors and worship leaders. At one point in the night, a lady began to sing a song that, in the world of theatre, we call a showstopper. She had the crowd in the palm of her hand. Her vocal talent was incredible, and her ability to lead the group to lift up their songs and spirits to Jesus was, in a word, anointed. The person standing next to me while this force of the spirit was happening on stage declared it, “She is anointed!” In my utter humanness, I ceased worshiping Jesus and I thought, “Am I anointed? I sure wish I could sing like that. I wish I could turn the crowd to Jesus in such a powerful way.”

Has this ever happened to you? Right there in the middle of the worship service, when you’re supposed to be worshipping the God of creation who loved us enough to save us by his own sacrifice, you realize, “That girl can really sing,” or “Man, that guitar player has a crazy amount of talent!” 

While the heavens are opening and the beauty of worshipping at the throne fills the room, suddenly we become covetous?

Coveting.  It’s not something we talk about much in the church. I don’t know why. Maybe we feel like there are worse sins that need our attention? Recently though, I’ve seen how coveting can cripple the church. When we desire the giftings, the authority, the position that others have been given, it can lead to broken relationships with each other and with God.

The Bible is filled with examples of the sin of coveting leading to disastrous outcomes. The original sin was, in part, Adam and Eve coveting God's power and omnipotence. The first murder was a result of coveting in Cain’s heart. Jacob and Esau craved each other’s possessions. Joseph’s brothers were covetous of his favor with their father.  The disciples desired the fame and honor that others seemed to have. Each of these people let their selfish desires take root, and it led to deeper and deeper sin. 

When we turn our attention to our desires, we lift up an idol in that moment. We’re thinking of ourselves when all the focus, honor, and glory is owed to Jesus.

And, coveting reveals that our heart is dissatisfied with what God has given us. It exposes a lack of gratitude. Like Simon Peter, when we take our eyes off of Jesus—his goodness, his provision, his creation of all good gifts—we begin to sink.

(sigh) This is not how I want to spend my time in worship. Makes me think of a song…

I'll bring You more than a song

For a song in itself

Is not what You have required

You search much deeper within

Through the way things appear

You're looking into my heart

I'm coming back to the heart of worship

And it's all about You, it's all about You, Jesus

I'm sorry, Lord, for the thing I've made it

When it's all about You, it's all about You, Jesus

When I stop and look full in his face, I’m just sick that I ever thought of anything besides my Savior and Friend… my healer, provider, shepherd, father, lover of my soul. Lord, please forgive me. Keep me from desiring the beauty of a voice or the skill of a musician. When worship begins, let me fix my eyes on you. It’s all about you, Jesus.